It never fails...

Me: I'm available until [time] to fix this issue. I cannot fix it after 5pm because it will take 20-30 minutes to fix.

([time] +15 minutes rolls around)
THEM: Okay, I need you to fix this now.


What's that? It was a two-for-one yesterday!!!!

Yup, I told two of them to get back to me by a certain time because I couldn't help them after that, and both of them insisted on completely ignoring that.

I gave you my word...

But it's rarely good enough.

It's not exactly rare, but it's not exactly common. What is it? When some blown up personality doesn't like hearing a situation and wants to hear it from someone else. I won't recount the entire conversation, because it so easily boils down to:

Me: What needs to happen is (long, tedious procedure to fix something)
Her: I don't like that answer. Have [my boss] call me and tell me that if it's the only thing that can be done.

Which I did...

Oh, it hurts...

Just when you think you can trust some one's ability with a computer...

Her: I have this problem -

(she goes on to explain her issue which I know how to fix and just tell her to restart her computer because her password expired)

Me: Okay, restart your computer.
Her: I just did.
Me: Before or after you had the problem you called about?
Her: After.

(about an hour of troubleshooting later, I STILL know it's got to be what I though initially, so I force her computer to restart)

Her: Oh, it wants me to reset my password.

(this is where I get stupid. I should have left it at that, but I was pissed that this person in particular who is usually very good about these things fell so far..)

Me: When did you restart your computer last?
Her: This morning when I got in.
Me: So you were having this problem last night? Because you said you restarted after you had the problems.
Her: No, I didn't restart it after the problems started.

(Even here, I could have probably have skated by...)

Me: Okay, in the future please try to do what I've asked you to do, even if you think you've done it already. We wasted an hour on a really easy problem. Perhaps I need to communicate better-
CLICK!

Yup, I'm going to catch hell for that.

How is that helping?

Him: I'm can't get into my computer, it says I'm locked out. Can you unlock me?
Me: Okay, I'll log into the server down there and take care of it... Hmm... it seems to be down.
Him: Well, they thought it wasn't working so they turned it off.

They never do as you say...

Me: Your user ID is (ID)

(a little later)

Him: I tried abcd(ID) and it didn't work. Thoughts?
Me: Your user ID is (ID). Not abcd(ID).

When power can't make things happen

Some people have reached a point in life where people grovel at their feet (figuratively speaking, or perhaps literally). I know many such people. Some of them believe they've hit the sub-godhood stage where their will can make the untrue true. I spoke to one of them today.

Him: I spilled some water on my keyboard this morning. It's being really slow and not very responsive.
Me: Okay. Water can move around very quickly in portable electronics. What I need you to do is power off the laptop, remove the battery and let it sit in a dry area for at least two days. If you keep using it, it is very likely to become too damaged to recover, if it isn't already.
Him: No. I can't do that. Have [my boss] call me with something else.